Compiled by Rolee Salcedo
Below
is a list of signs that could probably tell you whether or not you
are Filipino. If you know anyone from the beautiful Philippine
Islands, please show them this list. At least ONE of these items will
almost always apply:
If you have a "barrel man" in your house, you may be Filipino...(you know...the wooden man...when you lift up the barrel----schwing!!!)
If you wash your clothes by hand, you might be Filipino.
If you use walis tambo and walis ting-ting, you just might be Filipino.
If you nail all photographs on your walls in the living room, you're a Filipino.
If you eat your meals with a fork and a spoon, you must be Filipino.
If you smoke in your house
If you put up your knee while eating
If you eat kanin and ulam using your hand
If you have a GIANT fork and spoon hanging on your wall.
If your house smells like moth balls.
If you can cut your toenails with a pair of scissors.
If you say Comfort Room instead of Restroom.
If you say For Take Out instead of To-go.
If you point w/ your lips, then you might be a Filipino.
If you say open or close the lights, then you might be a Filipino.
If you nod upwards to greet someone, you might be a Filipino.
If your nickname is "boy", you might be a Filipino.
If you ask for a Colgate instead of a toothpaste, you might be a Filipino.
If you say "Canteen" instead of cafeteria, then you must be Filipino
You eat under-developed duck eggs.
You call it a "ballpoint" or"ballpen" , not a "pen" "one jeep only"
If you pronounce the word ALREADY as OLREYDI, you might be a Filipino.
If you say, Kodakan, instead of take pictures, you might be a Filipino.
If you do "mano po" to older people in the house you're about to enter, you might be a Filipino.
If you refer to to your refrigerator as "prigider"
If you say "pliers" when you meant "fliers"
If you say "bitch" when you meant "beach"
If you pronounce "hippopotamus" and "comfortable" in a funny way
If you say "Boose" for "bus"
If you cover your sofa with bright red and green blankets
If you have a Last Supper quilt tacked on your dining wall
If your "walking doll" is still new even though it was bought 15 years ago because your mom kept it in the china cabinet and never let you play with it, you might be Filipino.
If you drive a Mercedes-Benz with maroon seat covers.
If you hang a rosary on the rear view mirror of your car.
If you have a Santo Nino shrine in your living room.
If you buy the Karaoke system first before the stereo and TV
If you have an out of tune piano and nobody in the family ever learned to play, you just might be Filipino.
Kung may tabo sa kanilang mga kubeta, Pilipino ka.
If you say chok-o-late
If you have a "Weapons of Morroland" shield.
If you didn't hear or understand something and your first expression is "HA?", you might just be Filipino.
If you're standing next to 8 big boxes at the airport.
If you say 'hoy' to get someone's attention.
If you like peanut butter with chocolate.
If your car churps like a bird when it's in reverse.
If you car horn can make three or more different sounds, chances are good you're Filipino.
If you turn around when you hear somebody say "psssst."
If you instinctively grab a toothpick after a meal, you're probably a Filipino
If you order the langunisa meal on a PAL Balikbayan flight, you're probably Filipino
If you laugh seeing somebody slip,......
If you burp when you're busog(-or after sipping a beer)....
If you call somebody "psssst."
If you smiles/grins a lot even for no reason,.....
If you choose "thousand island" salad dressing...
If you're stumped when asked "How you doin'?"....
If, when asked "How was your weekend?, you answered back by telling them what you did that weekend,....
If when you sit by squatting down and leaning your elbows on your knees, you could be a Filipino.
If you use a Bolo to cut the grass in the yard, you could be a Filipino.
If you spend 3/4 of your spare time playing basketball
If you refer to kerosene as "white gas" You could be a Filipino.
If there are 2-3 pairs of flip flops outside your door
If you have power Failures every day at the same time that you can set your watch to, you must be a Filipino!
If your biggest frying pan is shaped like a wok, you could be a Filipino.
If you own both a rice cooker, and an air pot.
If you refer to "Accent" and all other forms of monosodium glutamate as "Ajinomoto" you are probably a Filipino.
If you go to a department store, and try to bargain the price.
If you drink with your friends and share the same glass, and pass it around, you could be a Filipino.
If you have a cartful of corned beef during a sale, you are definitely a Filipino.
If you say kutex instead of nail polish, you are one too.
If you are stomped when asked what kind of bread in a, you might be a Filipino who just flew in.
If you are hesitant to buy a coke because it costs 50c x 20 pesos, then you are a Filipino who just arrived.
If you miss an umbrella during a hot summer day, you might be a Filipino.
If you call the waiter 'boss' or 'brad' in the restaurant , you're probably Filipino. Also, when the waiter brings you food you didn't order, even when there are two waiters per table, you're probably among Filipinos.
If you're the plane passenger with the biggest hand- carry luggage, you're probably Filipino
If you scratch your head when you don't know what you're doing, you're probably Filipino.
If you don't want to eat the last piece of food on the plate, but offer it to others, you're probably Filipino.
If you know what D.O.M., K.S.P. and T.N.T. mean, then you're probably Filipino.
When you put up a sign in your restaurant, saying 'no undershirts and sandals',then you're probably Filipino.
If you burn your trash in the back yard, you're probably Filipino.
If you go to a bowling alley anywhere on this planet and see a group of guys playing pusoy, then they're probably Filipinos.
If you hold your picnic in the park under the trees while others are basking under the full glory of the summer sun, you're probably a Filipino ...
If you say 'for a while' instead of 'please hold while I get the person' on the telephone ...
If you "open the light" and "open the TV", you are as Filipino as ERAP.
If you add an "H" in your name (where it shouldn't be)... example: JHUN, MHIKE, KHEN, SAHMMEEH... you're Filipino.
If you smoke "Blue Seal" and eat "Tasty" bread... you're definitely not Danish!
If you say "she" when you should say "he"
If you say "ano" this and "ano" that
If you put your hands together and point them in the direction you are walking to pass between other people
If you turned your garage into a weld shop for making wrought iron gates
You wear your fancy clothes and jewelry when you go back to the Philippines
You start speaking your language and then catch yourself when you realize that the person you are talking to gives you a blank stare
You answer the phone and the voice squeaks "Philippines calling for <your name>, will you accept the charges?"
You say that everybody is your cousin/ niece/ nephew/ aunt/ uncle/...
If you have a big Buddha at home for good luck (not the serene Buddha like what the Thais have, but the big, fat, laughing one with those pesky little kids crawling all over him), then you're a Filipino.
If somebody flashes the victory sign, and you think that he or she isa fan of 'Ate Vi', you must be a Filipino.
If you bring a "baon" to work everyday, you're probably a Filipino.
When drinking with friends, everyone relishes the food by sharing the same fork. Everyone in that table is a Filipino.
When your ice cold beer really has ice cubes in it, you might be Filipino.
When you eat balut and wash it down with beer to bulk up (damn the high\blood pressure), you definitely are Filipino.
When you have a ruler sticking out of your gas tank, you might be a Filipino.
When you have those air fresheners in the bottle, you might be a Filipino.
When your favorite candy is Choc-Nut, you are definitely Filipino.
When you use patis bottles as water containers and store them in the pridyider, you are Filipino.
When you have a parol hanging outside your house during the Christmas holidays, you are definitely a Filipino.
When you say things sorta backwards like towelpaper instead of papertowel and stick bread instead of breadsticks.
When you say guper instead of gopher (the "PH" sound doesn't exist)
Eat rice for breakfast, Lunch or Dinner.
If you say "aray" instead of "ouch %$!@" when you get hurt.
If you look up and say "ha!" when somebody says "what's up".
If you enjoy telling jokes about being a Filipino.
If you write "Filipino" but pronounce it as "Pilipino".
If you can sustain jokes like this one indefinitely.
If you often say 'Bulaga!' when you want to scare someone, you might just be Filipino
If you call Mercedes Benz cars 'chiding'.
If your neighbors complain about the smell of tuyo on a Sunday morning
If you go to the streets during the coup d'etat just for the hell of it.
If you fire your gun like crazy on new year's eve
If you drive a jeep with your family name written on the back.
If you have one of those 'footsteps in the sands' posters in your room.
If you like everything that's imported.
You have a jar ooong on your prigider door.
If you dare come up with an explanation for everything because you do not want to say 'i do not know!'.
You put a little bowl of patis on the table for dipping, and your guests complain "who farted."
If you cover your living room furniture with bed sheets (vinyl covers in P.I.).
If you have toyo circles on your table cloths (also applies to other Asian-Pacific peoples)
If you wash and reuse disposable Styrofoam cups, forks and spoons and of course, aluminum wrapper (or do they call them Reynolds wrap) or cover paper plates with waxed paper so you can reuse it, you might be Filipino.
If you cover your carpet floors with plastic liners, you might be Filipino.
If the first thing you do when you buy clothes, towels, etc., is look at the label to see where it was made, you might be Filipino.
If you say "bumper to bumper" instead of traffic, you must be a Filipino
If you bring your own "baon" to Disneyland, you must be a Filipino
If you say "bread" instead of money, you must be a Filipino
If you say "kilikili power" instead of armpit odor, then you're definitely a Filipino
If you use "tawas" instead of a deodorant, you must be a Filipino